A few days ago, I came across something, maybe while scrolling online or flipping through a book, that hasn't left my thoughts since: People tell you their true intentions all the time. They show you who they are. Listen to them. Don't project. Accept people for what they are.
Nothing revolutionary about this idea, right? But for some reason, this time it really stuck with me. And now it keeps popping up in my head throughout the day.
I find myself thinking back to conversations where someone essentially told me exactly who they were, and I chose not to really hear it. Those moments when I decided my interpretation was more accurate than what they were actually showing me.
"I'm not good at commitment." "I don't really have time for close friendships." "I tend to disappear when things get difficult."
They told me. They literally told me. And how many times did I respond by thinking, "But maybe with me it will be different"?
Now this thought follows me around daily. When a coworker says they'll "try" to meet a deadline, I notice how I automatically assume they definitely will. When a friend who's always late says they're "on the way," I see how I've been making excuses rather than accepting this is just how they operate.
The interesting part is that it's not about judging people. That's what keeps resonating with me. Accepting people as they present themselves isn't about deciding if they're good or bad—it's just about seeing what's actually there instead of what I wish was there.
There's something kind of freeing about this realization. I've spent so much energy trying to figure people out when often they've already shown me who they are. I've felt disappointed when people act exactly like they said they would, just because I convinced myself they didn't mean it.
I'm looking at my relationships differently now. It's uncomfortable sometimes, I'll admit. I'm noticing patterns in myself that are a bit embarrassing to acknowledge. But it also feels like removing a weight I didn't know I was carrying.
I'm not sure how long this particular thought will dominate my mind. But I have a feeling its influence will stick around. For now, I'm appreciating this mental reminder that keeps things simple:
Listen. See. Accept.
There's peace in reality, even when it's not what I imagined it would be.
